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【关于电视的雅思作文望点评Televisionhashadasignificantinfluenceonthecultureofmanysocieties.Towhatextenddoyouthinktelevisionhaspositivelyornegativelyaffectedculturaldevelopment?Ithasbeenapublicconcernthatthes】
更新时间:2024-04-17 04:47:35
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关于电视的雅思作文望点评

Televisionhashadasignificantinfluenceonthecultureofmanysocieties.Towhatextenddoyouthinktelevisionhaspositivelyornegativelyaffectedculturaldevelopment?

IthasbeenapublicconcernthatthesocietycultureisbeinginfluencedbytheTV.Toalargeextend,frommyperspective,theadvantagesoutweighthedisadvantages.

Tocurrentpeople,someTVprogramsprovideusthechancestoacquiretheknowledgeaboutpreviouslife.Bywatchingtelevisions,notcanweonlygettoknowwhatsortoflifeourancestorswereliving,butwecanalsofindwhatwecanlearnfromthepreviousculturewhichseemsasanexpansionofthemodernone.Forexample,bywatchingtheseriesaboutthehistory,wecanlearnhistoricalcustomandindailylife,itiseasyforustoshowourfriendlinesstoothers.

Apartfromthis,thetelevisionisalsoausefultoolforindividualstolearnforeigncultures.Inmodernsociety,thereisatrendtoabsorbbenefitsfromotherculturesworldwide.SincetheTVwasinvented,thousandsofforeignTVshowshavebeenimported,whichofferthepublictheopportunitiestolearnforeignculture.BywatchingtheseTVshows,itisofconveniencetolearnEnglishandotherculturalbranchessuchasthesport.ItisobviousthatChinesesportbenefitsfromtheNBA,theChampionsleagueandothersportsshows.

Ofcoursethereisadangerofculturalinvasion.SomepeoplemightlossthemselvesbywatchingandlearningthedarksideofTVprograms.ButitissimpletobeavoidedbecausewejustneedtocontrolthequalityandthenumberoftheTVprograms.

Onbalance,iamconvincedtherearemoreadvantagesofTVoncultures.Ifwecangetthebenefitswhileavoidingnegativeparts,couldtelevisionbeacrucialfactortomakeaculture’ssuccess.

曹长修回答:
  内容没多少大问题,文笔过于平淡,但是短期很难提高,6-6.5左右的档次.指出几个修改建议,在Academicwriting里面,像Iyou和we都是不能出现的,可以通过改变句子结构来去掉,suchasz主动改被动.还有就是People和think这两个词太土了,people可以用具体的主人公来代替,例子,第三段开头的Tocurrentpeople可以直接改成currently就好了.think有很多可以替的像believe,argue等等.
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